This is a posting about my time at London to see the reading of the John Osborne play, Look Back In Anger.
I freely admit that I went purely to see Benedict Cumberbatch perform. So therefore this posting is mainly about my thoughts & feelings with regard to seeing him in the flesh etc. So don't expect a blow-by-blow account of the play.
Got to the
Duke of York theatre with time to spare, noticing on arrival that there
were quite a few people milling around on the not-too-wide pavement. I
did wonder then if they were waiting for someone....
My
friend who I was with (Mandy) was trying to get a return ticket for her
daughter which she wasn't able to, so we ended up just milling outside
along with everyone else (even though it was raining).
There
was an oldish man on a step selling The Big Issue, and he said to both
Mandy & myself that "he was out now". And we were like, "who is?"
"Do you mean who we think you mean?" Anyway, he didn't really reply so
Mandy went to speak to her daughter, but something made me turn my head
and look a little way up the road and there, standing outside the
right-hand side of the theatre front was Benedict Cumberbatch himself!
There
was quite a few girls around him taking photos & getting
autographs, and he being that bit taller than everyone else, I could see
him clearly above them. And the first thing I spotted was his beige
'War Horse' cap.
So,
I went over, scrabbling around in my bag for something he could
possibly sign. When I noticed that Mandy was still talking to her
daughter and clearly hadn't noticed. I shouted a few times to her, to
no avail, so in the end, when I wasn't far from Benedict himself, I
turned round and gave an loud whistle and shouted, "Mandy, he's over
here!" Good lord, if Benedict happened to hear any of that he must have
thought I was incredibly common!
So,
we ended up kind of just standing there hoping to get close and
get something signed but sadly it didn't happen. Cos not long afterwards I
heard him say that that was all he could sign for now and that he had to
go inside the theatre. He proceeded to walk straight past me and that
was that.
I
turned round and watched him as he walked past only to be a little miffed to see him sign stuff for a couple
of people who were behind me (and thus standing where I'd been at the very start), so I walked over and stood there. I could have touched his
leather jacket, I could have got his attention by saying his name, but I
didn't. I guess I didn't want to appear pushy, and I was remembering
that he had already said once that he must get inside the theatre. So I
just stood there, willing for him to slightly turn my way cos I
certainly would have asked for him to sign something then. It
was difficult not to when he was literally right in front of me (albeit
with his back to me). But when he finished, sadly he just walked
straight off into the theatre. Never mind, I was hoping he'd come out
to see his fans after the performance.
The
play reading was 2 and a half hours! I had
front row seats. Front row seats to just sit there and admire the
talent there in front of me. Front row seats to enjoy all the
performers just sitting there acting their socks off in the same chair
for the entire duration of that afternoon's performance.
And
whilst I thoroughly enjoyed the play, even though it was a rehearsal
reading and not an actual production as such, actually seeing Benedict
on stage was something else....
I admit that I spent the whole time just gazing at him, looking at every little bit of him I
could. Yes, I was trying to enjoy the play but when 'he' was literally only a few feet away from you, and on stage the whole time, it was too good an opportunity to pass up. I was really giving him the once over (or twice and thrice
over!) I was eyeing up his watch, his shoes, his colourful natty socks, his
leather jacket which he took off on stage during the first half, his
muscles (oh those muscles, which he'd got just finishing Star Trek and which I could see clearly through his white t-shirt...gulp), oh, and his lovely floppy hair which he seemed to like playing with. It was very easy to do that
from the front-row with Ben just sitting there right in front of you for a few hours. He did tend to look around at the audience if he wasn't reading a scene so I got a few nice bits of eye contact too (one of which I felt compelled to turn away!)
Ben
did almost stand up during his performance a few times. It's amazing
how physically into it he got. He was always turning around in his
chair directly addressing his words to the person in question. (Did I say turning? More like bouncing!) It was great
to see. And whilst everyone else had their scripts in a nice black folder...not
Benedict, his script was all loose in his hands (with a few things
written down here & there, I noticed).
One particular scene I remember was between Benedict's character (Jimmy Porter) and Rebecca Hall's character (Alison Porter) and was towards the end. They were married in the play and had been estranged for a while (mainly cos Jimmy was always such an absolute pig to her), and in this scene he discovers that she'd been carrying his child but had miscarried. It was beautifully played, especially by Rebecca. There were tears aplenty from both of them and I just sat there completely drawn-in and mesmerised by this scene being played out before my eyes.
This wasn't the only time Benedict cried during the performance. Another time I remember in particular, was equally as moving. The emotion displayed was astonishing. Benedict didn't just weep, but he really cried. He had tears dripping down his face, coming off his chin and there was snot and everything. Yes, that shows you just how much into this role he actually got. It was really incredible.
But Benedict aside, the play was fantastic. All wonderfully performed with some superb acting. Such an array of talent on the stage (the likes of Rebecca Hall & Anna Maxwell-Martin not to mention Benedict himself), doesn't happen very often and it was an honour to have been there that day to see it.
When the show finished, because of where I was sitting, I could see the cast off-stage at the side. And while I was getting my stuff together I could see Ben chatting with them and I kind of took my time because his voice just stood out from the others, even off stage.
And then we were outside the theatre. Good lord.....
The people waiting for him afterwards was quite incredible. I've never
seen that amount of people waiting to get near someone in a long time.
When he came out, Benedict had a bit of a 'rabbit in the headlights' look for a moment
(although he did get a huge cheer when he first came out which I thought
was nice). When
he first emerged he actually just stood there for a few seconds as he
surveyed the huge crowd before him and it was like he was thinking,
"Holy crap, are you all here for me?"
Mandy and myself were right at the back of the queue. I say 'queue' in its broadest possible sense, it was more a crowd. A throng. A mob, if you will.
The old man selling The Big Issue was still there, and he kindly gave up his step and asked me if I fancied standing on it so I could get a better view of Benedict. I was quite touched by this act of generosity and stood on the step (although I got the impression that this man was wearing a 'seen-this, done-that' sort of expression).
It's
a shame Benedict didn't hang around longer than 10 minutes
though. Once things seemed to get a little more congested than it was
deemed fit, one of his fellow-performers from that afternoon came and
helped him away before things got a bit much for him.
A couple of factors I thought contributed to this.......
- I wish when people had had their photo/signature/time with Benedict, that they then had had the good grace to move out the way. Nope, most just stayed put getting in the way. Someone did say to me that they tried to move but couldn't. Well, that's when the words, "excuse me" come into good use, surely?
- The dealers there (who sell the autographs they get) were really starting to anger Ben. Apparently he said no to someone three times who already had had numerous photos signed and who still kept pestering for more.
- I know that with some theatres in London that they do operate a system whereby at the stage door people can queue for autographs/photos etc, in an orderly fashion with the aid of a barrier system put in place. And yet that afternoon, they must have known that Benedict was a big draw, the ticket sales must have told them that, but the security there was non-existent, no barriers or anything.
I did manage to record a wee bit of video of Ben whilst in the crowd and when he left. As he walked right by me (I was
squashed up against the wall as he passed), all I got
was a blurry black image of his leather jacket and a quick thank you (not sure who to). But what you do see is
a little bit of Ben's retreating back as he was dashing off to his
waiting car. Some people were almost
pounding on the car as he got in. That part shamed me a little.
Then at this point, literally just after the car pulled
away, a known autograph dealer (who I'd seen earlier bragging about
getting Ben's autograph but then Ben had refused to sign anything more
for him) stormed passed me in a right strop. Yes, he'd been in the
crowd yet again, trying to get more signatures to sell for extortionate
amounts, and I can only gather that Ben or someone associated with him
had told him where to go, cos as he passed me he was ranting.... "Now,
I'm really f**ked off! I'm going to f**king hurt someone". Needless to
say, I moved right out of his way.
I hope this gets sorted in
the future, cos Ben will stop greeting his fans if this carries on. It
really wasn't fun, for Benedict or for us really.
Once
Ben had gone obviously the crowd dispersed. It was amazing how quickly
it could be done! So myself & Mandy left too. Yes, I was
disappointed not to have either a good photo, an autograph or anything
like that. But actually I wasn't too despondent. I hoped there'd be
other chances to see Benedict again.
I
just felt privileged to see the man at work. It may have only been a
rehearsed play-reading but it was fascinating to see all the emotions
and feelings etc, to which he portrayed Jimmy Porter. That character is
not an easy one to play. And that afternoon of Friday 6th July 2012, I
just felt so honoured to have been sitting watching that performance of
Look Back In Anger at the Duke of York theatre.
(Thank you to whoever took this photo)
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